Jawnville Podcast Episode 19

It’s that time. Time for another hour of glorious, drunken Philly discussion with our panel of Mike, Rachel, and Nicole.

This episode cover Atlantic City, Philly roaches, sandwiches, milkshakes, sugardaddies, Game of thrones, banging Ed Sheeran and more. Seriously, you need to listen to Nicole’s reveal of random guys sending her money and roaches infesting a city block. If you don’t laugh this episode, I’ll give ya a penny. Just ignore my over-modulating mic, if you can.

Don’t forget to subscribe via iTunes or Stitcher, etc and tell all your friends about the funniest and most informative podcast about life in the wonderful City of Brotherly Love.

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Wawa Hoagiefest Gone Wrong

Wawa has officially jumped the shark with Hoagiefest. Quite honestly, I’m surprised Hoagiefest is a thing in Philly with all the good delis we have in town. I don’t think Wawa hoagies would rank in my top 50 of Philadelphia hoagies, but what do I know. Hoagiefest is a thing and people love it.

Yesterday, I ran into the Wawa at 38th and Walnut to grab a snack while my dog was being seen over at Penn. I crashed into a poor woman as I passed the donut rack and completely loss all sense of my surroundings after seeing this:

You’re eyes do not deceive you. Those are donuts with Hoagiefest logo icing. Could anything be a more ridiculous indication of consumerism gone all wrong?

I like a good donut. I sometimes buy them when I had no intention of buying a donut. I’m usually sucked in by the glistening white or chocolate icing and even more so by the donuts covered in icing with multi-colored jimmies.

These things simultaneous look stupid and unappetizing. The icing looks as thick as the sole of a shoe.

We get it. HOAGIEFEST. HOAGIEFEST. HOAGIEFEST. Leave the donuts alone.

 

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Someone actually bought a Carson Wentz AO1 shirt and wore it to Center City Sips?!

Someone actually bought a Carson Wentz AO1 shirt and wore it to Center City Sips?!

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Philly Animals Need in Need of Help

This came up on my Facebook feed this week.

Philadoptables is a fantastic non-profit that provides supportive services and funds to Philadelphia’s Animal Care & Control Team (ACCT), which is basically the city pound for cats and dogs.

ACCT Philly is the only open shelter in Philadelphia, which means anyone can drop off their dog or cat at any time 24/7/365. Unfortunately, upwards of 22,000 dogs and cats enter the shelter each year. That’s about 60/day.

While ACCT has been doing a great job of improving their save rates (animals that leave the shelter alive), which are over 80%, there are times when the shelter is at max capacity and that is problematic. When the shelter is at max capacity, animals must be euthanized, killed, simply due to space so that kennels are available to additional strays/surrenders.

As noted above, the shelter is at max capacity this week. Healthy, adoptable dogs and cats will be euthanized due to over-crowding. But, they don’t have to be. You, me, all of us can help.

How? I’m glad you asked.

If you have space, FOSTER a dog or cat in your home. You save that animals life and open a space to save another life.

ADOPT. Don’t buy a dog/cat from a breeder. Yes, it’s true that a portion of ACCT dogs are terrier mixes (pitbulls and others) and that doesn’t work for everyone, but that’s not all of them. There are plenty of retriever, collie, and other mixes. ACCT also partners with dozens and dozens of local shelters, who pull animals out of ACCT. If you adopt from a shelter you’ll most likely free up space at that shelter so they will be able to pull another dog/cat from ACCT and SAVE ANOTHER LIFE.

SPREAD THE WORD. Tell your friends, neighbors, co-workers that Philadelphia has an on-going animal crisis and we can all help out.

VOLUNTEER. Spend time at the shelter interacting with the dogs and cats to help them become better socialized and more adoptable.

DONATE.  ACCT needs funding. Skip a latte, beer, or soda and donate the $1, $3, $5 to ACCT. We go crazy for Dollar Dog Night at a Phillies game. How about if you go to those games and spend $5 on dogs you donate $5 to dogs via here?

We are better than having to kill dogs/cats due to space, but it’s an unfortunate reality due to space limitations and ACCT being woefully underfunded. Get involved. Save a life. There ain’t nothing better.

Dogs and cats need saving. It’s not some insurmountable endeavor. It simply takes us all being cognizant of the problem and doing something, anything, in our own immediate world.

This doesn’t end this week if the shelter opens space. This is ongoing. I could post this once a month, at least. But, if the majority of us got involved I wouldn’t have to.

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5 Questions with Philly Legend Dan Baker

If you’re a Philly sports fan, Dan Baker is probably a household name. If you’ve been to a Phillies or Eagles game in the past three decades, you’ve heard his welcoming and pleasant voice. Dan has been the public address announcer for the Phillies since 1972 and was the Eagles PA announcer from 1985-2014. Baker was also the radio announcer for Drexel men’s basketball from 1997-2012 as well as broadcasting Big 5 basketball games for 21 years.

Dan Baker is also one of the friendliest and nicest humans you’ll ever encounter. We sat down with him at O’Neal’s Pub where he sometimes announces away Phillies games. I highly recommend you attend one of Bakers events.

He also keeps score of the away games while hosting his events.

Mr. Baker was kind enough to sit with us and answer five questions, six technically.

WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CONCERT:

First concert? Oh gosh, I could tell you my last concert.  I went to an oldies show at Ruth Eckerd Hall (Clearwater, FL) last St. Patrick’s Day Friday March 17 and the Tokens were there with Jay Siegel. The Marcells, they sang Blue Moon. The Tokens sang The Lion Sleeps Tonight. Let’s see, the Crests were there. Little Peggy March who sang I will follow him. That was my last concert.

WHAT’S YOUR GO TO FOOD AT CITIZENS BANK PARK:

I eat at the media dining room most of the time and they have all kinds of great food in there. I guess my favorite night is Italian Night when they have spaghetti and meatballs or spaghetti and sausage.

FAVORITE PLAYER AS A KID:

Robin Roberts, number 36 who won twenty games or more six straight years from 1950 through 1955.

MOVIE THAT YOU CAN ALWAYS WATCH:

The Godfather. Gladiator is another one I like a lot.

(follow up) FAVE CHARACTER IN GODFATHER:

I think Don Corleone, Marlon Brando, I thought it was a great performance. There are many great performances in that movie. And, the most recent movie that I saw that I really enjoyed was Lion, It’s terrific.

FAVE BIG FIVE MOMENT:

There’s been a lot of those. Being with Penn at the Final Four in 1979. Along the way you know they had some big upsets and I think one of the moments that I’ll remember is when they beat St. Johns to win the Eastern Regional to qualify them for the Final Four. In the semifinal game in the Eastern Regional in Greensboro they defeated Syracuse and Jim Boeheim. One of the sportswriters for the Daily Pennsylvania at the press conference following the game said to Jim Boeheim, “Coach Boeheim do you realize you just lost to an Ivy League Team?” And Boeheim said, “I beg your pardon. We just lost to a Big Five team”. So that was pretty neat.

To stay up to date with Dan Baker appearances and other interesting tidbits, follow Dan Baker on twitter.

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Trading for Stanton and Yelich Makes Too Much Sense

If you’re a Phillies fan and you don’t want to trade for Giancarlo Stanton and Christian Yelich, I want what you’re smoking—especially if it’s an indica.

There is zero reason for the Phillies not to do this deal yesterday. Look how good these guys look in Phillies colors.

Yelich is a no-brainer. He’s young. He’s one of the better centerfielders in the game and he’s under contract through 2022, if you include the club option, at a reasonable number. Yelich’s average salary on his remaining contract is $10.7M. That’s a bargain in baseball.

For Yelich alone, the Phillies would have to pay a king’s ransom. If the Marlins throw Giancarlo Stanton into the deal, that ransom because far more sensible, according to MLB talking heads, because it’s basically a salary dump. The reality is that few teams can or want to take on the remainder of Stanton’s $325M contract.

Stanton currently has 30 HRs. He’s on pace for upwards of 50. Stanton would easily mash 50HRs playing his home games at Citizen Bank Park. And, Stanton is only 27. Let’s put that in perspective. Aaron Altherr is 26. Trout is 25.

He’s young. Yes, he spends time on the DL each year. Even in those years, he hasn’t hit less than 27 home runs. That would lead the Phillies last year and probably this year.

If you’re fearful of his contract, don’t be. You simply suffer from PTSD from the Ryan Howard contract. Stanton is more athletic and in better shape than Howard. Stanton can hit both left-handed and right-handed pitching.  He’s 27. He’ll be 37 at the end of his contract. That’s not terribly old.

More importantly, his contract isn’t that insane. In two years, the MLB free agent period is going to explode with Bryce Harper, Manny Machado and the greatest free agent class maybe ever. Trout is a free agent the year after. There is talk of Harper and Machado getting contracts of 10 years $450M.

Today, Jeff Passan at Yahoo Sports did an article about Trout’s impending free agency.

That’s another estimate at $40M/year for 15 years.

Stanton’s number now seems large at $25M and it increases to $29M and $32M towards the back end of his contract. However, in two or three years, players will be getting upwards of $40M/year. Those $25M, $29M, and $32M will seem ordinary in a few short years, ones that should be Stanton’s prime.

The Phillies have nothing committed on their payroll aside from Herrera and a handful of arbitration. They have money to spend and owner John Middleton says they’ll be spending money. Trade for Stanton and Yelich now.

Image an outfield of Stanton, Yelich, and either Altherr or Williams (one of those two will have to be included in the deal) and you may have one of the better outfields in the NL.

AND, it gives the fans a reason to pay attention and watch, which will also make Comcast happy since they paid a crazy amount for the rights to televise Phillies games. EVERYBODY WINS.

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TOOLBAG ALERT: Ed Sheeran

It’s bad enough Ed Sheeran infiltrated Game of Thrones with a pointless cameo. He also recently did a couple of shows at Wells Fargo and decided to have a cheesesteak while in town. Did he go to Pat’s? Geno’? Jim’s? Tony Luke’s? John’s Roast Pork? Dalessandro’s?

Nah. None of the above.

According to People Magazine, He went Barclay Prime and paid $143 for his cheesesteak, which had the additional lobster topping. What a toolbag, especially after playing in South Philly! This guy is as superficial and shallow as the crap boy-band/singer-songwriting music he peddles.

Let’s also not lose fact of the total VIOLATION of Barclay Prime for featuring such a pretentious and obnoxious version of the famous Philly sandwich. I can smell that item every time I walk past Barclay Prime and reeks like douchebaggery.

Sheeran did wear a Phillies jersey at one of the shows.

And…he apparently showed up to Chickie’s & Pete’s in his pajamas, so there’s that.

Neither makes up for the $143 cheesesteaks. A true man of the people.

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Fultz Too Young To Party

You remember when you were a kid and some of your friends had those “cool” parents that would let you drink alcohol as long as you did it under the roof? My parents weren’t those parents, but I often slept over those kind of parents’ houses in my teenage years.

I’m thinking Ebony Fultz, Markelle Fultz’s mother, may be one of those parents. She might be cool with Markelle drinking alcohol as long as it’s under her supervision. How else could you explain this:

The NBA Summer League Day Pool Party is hosted by Markelle and happens to be sponsored by two alcohol companies. The kid is 19, right? His parties are sponsored by Hennessy and Belaire Luxe.

I’m hoping Ms. Fultz is in attendance. That would make more sense. The 19-year-old future star of the Sixers would be wise to have parental guidance at this party…we don’t need any stupid, drunken accidents.

How does the NBA endorse this kind of $tuff? Adam Silver and the Sixers’ brass have to know this is bad optics. It’ll go over great with the teens at the youth center where I coach hoops. Probably see some Hennessy swag when we start back up in October.

Heads up to the always astute and innovate 97.5 producer Jamie Lynch for bringing this to our attention.

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Sixers Have Served Their Penance

When Fultz twisted his ankle, 99.231% of all Sixers fans cried out some sort of exclamation of disbelief and pessimism. I heard at least a half dozen or so of people open their windows in my South Philly neighborhood, stick their heads out and yell the following:

NOT AGAIN!

WE’RE SCREWED!

WE’RE DOOMED!

OUT FOR THE YEAR!

THE BASKETBALL GODS HATE US!

After the injuries of Embiid and Simmons and the history of Philadelphia sports, it’s easy to understand a reaction of negativity. Even journalists and web sites asked questions about the basketball gods punishing the Sixers for tanking.

However, Markelle Fultz is okay. He’s not wearing a boot. He’s not on crutches. In fact, he was seen at practice walking around.

This has to be a sign that the Sixers past is the past and the franchise is now entering the proverbial light at the end of the tunnel.

While it may be true that the basketball gods, and league office, weren’t totally keen on the Hinkie tanking, as a superstitious person and recovering Catholic, I think it’s safe to say the Sixers have paid their penance and good things are on the horizon. The Kings swap working in the Sixers’ favor corroborates this as well.

I remember, from my confessional days, that missing mass on Sunday may get you a penance of 7 Hail Marys and 10 Our Fathers. A lie to your parents might get you 4 Hail Marys, 4 Our Fathers, and 1 Glory Be.

The Sixers did upwards of four years of tanking. They paid a penance of two lost years of Embiid, one lost year of Ben Simmons, an a terrible Okafor year. 4 years of tanking and 4 collective seasons of penance.

That’s fair. That’s just. Any additional penance/punishment would be unjust to the fans of Philadelphia.

That twisted ankle of Markelle Fultz was a sign and a reminder. A reminder of how quick the energy of the universe could’ve crushed the hopes of another season, but also a sign that penance has been served and all is right with these basketball gods.

It’s gonna be a fun one. 10-9-8-76ers!

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Having a @stbenjaminbrew beer in a zen garden with @parksontap #philly #summer

Having a @stbenjaminbrew beer in a zen garden with @parksontap #philly #summer

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